The Gifts of Imperfection...

"Yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable and sometimes afraid, but that doesn't change the truth that I am also brave and worthy of love and belonging."
-Brenè Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection

I'm a big Brenè Brown fan. Earlier this month I saw that she and Oprah were running a repeat of The Gifts of Imperfection e-course... the soul-searching/art-journaling/wholehearted-living theme seemed to fit right into the place where my head and heart lie at the moment. When I saw that the second lesson was called "Cultivating Authenticity" [my word for 2014 is "authentic"]... I was a goner. I forked over my credit card number and made plans to embrace my watercolors and Prismacolors for the next six weeks.

One of the DIG Deeper prompts this week encourages me to share my journal with a community of people who will keep me inspired. I can't promise that I'll share every page in this space, but here's at least the first week... I'm going to let the pages speak for themselves.

Permission slips // I give myself permission to...

Perfection pledge // I'm imperfect and I'm enough.

Courage is a heart word // Who has earned the right to hear my story?

Authentic... my intentions

"How we spend our days is of course how we spend our life."
-Annie Dillard

The January prompt from Ali Edwards' One Little Word workshop encouraged me to list my intentions for the year.

This year I hope to...

Continue my healthy routines... increasing my fitness level // making healthy eating choices // limiting sodas // taking care of myself. I made great progress in this area in 2013 and hope to continue that momentum this year.

Explore how I want to grow professionally... I'm pretty sure that I won't be in my current position for the rest of my life. I find myself longing for a bit more creativity, a bit more autonomy, a bit more alignment with my passions. I have some ideas about "dream jobs," yet they all seem very distant from where I am today... after a year of mere survival (2010-11) and then a couple of years of sheer gratitude for having any job (2011-2013), I find myself ready to find out what my "dream job" might be and to start moving in that direction.

Focus on what really matters... uncluttering the house // buying quality and fair-trade // living fully in this moment // making intentional choices.

Strengthen relationships... connecting with Rob in a more loving and honest way that respects both of our needs // supporting Callie as much as I can through this season of change // corresponding with family members, like Dan and Mimi through monthly letters // reconnecting with old friends, like Ashley and Hillary // hosting another party or get-together for local friends.

Find a sustainable way to serve the community/church/world... I worry that the most obvious volunteer opportunities (soup kitchens, homeless shelters, etc.) won't be a good fit with my introverted personality (although I'm willing to be surprised!); however, I know that my design/planning skills could be a great asset for the right non-profit. The challenge is finding the time and energy to do something "extra."

Hope to get pregnant and experience motherhood...
But, be at peace if that (or anything else that I have planned) doesn't happen on my timeline... As it has been said, "the only constant thing is change." No matter what happens this year, there are guaranteed to be some instances of upheaval, unfamiliarity, and paradox, either by choice or circumstance. I hope that I am able to honor and even grieve those losses, but then lean into and embrace the unexpected changes.

Look for inspiration... Since I am yet not sure what exactly what I'm looking for this year, I want to embrace as many soul searching opportunities as I can. You can only hear answers if you're listening. I've bitten the bullet on Brene' Brown and Oprah's The Gifts of Imperfection e-course. I've also added several titles on my to-read list, hoping to gain insight from the perspectives of those who have gone before me. I'd also be open to some kind of life coaching/career counseling/mentoring/etc.

Follow my progress and be inspired.

2014 One Little Word: Authentic

“The place God calls you to is the place where your deep gladness and the world’s deep hunger meet.”
-Frederick Buechner

I am choosing the word "authentic" to inspire my year. [I have chosen a guiding word for the past three years: 2011, 2012, 2013. Last year I also participated in Ali Edwards' One Little Word workshop, which was totally the highlight of my year... totally doing that again!]

My journey with the word "momentum" last year led me to the insight that there's never enough time, energy, money, or talent in my life to take on every project or to succeed in every endeavor. I want to be intentional about the ways I spend my days, so that my life best reflects my true self. Who am I... what do I want... how do I want to use my momentum?

In 2013 I desired to push myself past my comfort zones, but this year I want to spend time listening to what is already in my heart. I expect that my journey this year will be about finding what resonates with me in all aspects of my life. And, then living into that which makes my soul sing.

Follow my progress and be inspired.

Holiday Storyteller... Christmas project to-do list

"It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas 
Toys in ev'ry store 
But the prettiest sight to see is the holly that will be 
On your own front door."

[This year I'm participating in Holiday Storyteller, a free e-course from Simple Scrapper. I thought it would be a wonderful way to get in the mood and reflect on the season. Maybe these journaling prompts will inspire a few blog posts as well.]

Dec. 2 - Holiday projects... Do you have everything you need? How often will you work on it? Can you simplify further?

Besides shopping for Christmas gifts (which I hope to complete this week!), I have very few must-do crafty projects on my agenda this holiday.

Link to my Holidays Pinterest board

1. After putting up my decorations yesterday, I have a hankering to make my fireplace mantel sparkle a bit more. I searched on Pinterest for inspiration, but haven't yet found a picture of exactly what I want... something bold and graphic, colored with red, white, and green. I think I'll try to squeeze in a trip to the craft store this week for a bit more greenery and maybe a decoration or two.

2. One of my favorite parts of the holiday season is sending and receiving Christmas cards. I always love a good excuse to design pretty paper goods. This year I found invitations/envelopes at Hobby Lobby that I'm going to use as the main part of our card. I still need to pick up printed photos from Sam's to attach to each card, as well as to decide on what message to write or print on the other side of the card. And, then of course there's addressing, stamping, and licking envelopes, but that can always be tackled late one night by the light of the Christmas tree.

3. The one handmade gift on my list this year will accompany my nephew's Lego sets. I saw a great tutorial online for a toy bag to keep all of the small pieces together. I need to run by the fabric store to purchase both some clear vinyl and some coordinating fabric, and then most importantly need to find a chunk of time to lock myself away with the sewing machine. Of course my grand vision includes adding a pocket to the front of the bag... I hope my sewing skills are up for a challenge.

Holiday Storyteller... kicking off Christmas

Each year, you bring to me delight
Gleaming in the christmas night.
O christmas tree, o christmas tree,
Of all the trees most lovely

This year I'm participating in Holiday Storyteller, a free e-course from Simple Scrapper. I thought it would be a wonderful way to get in the mood and reflect on the season. Maybe these prompts will inspire a few blog posts as well.

Dec. 1 - What is one food or tradition that kicks off your holiday season or that really makes it feel like the holidays?

For me, Christmas arrives when the Christmas tree is up and the lights are lit. This year (and last year as well) our tree is standing in the corner of the living room near the fireplace. We set the tree up before we left for Thanksgiving but saved the ornaments and other decorating until after we returned.

As I look at our little tree from a distance, I'm thinking it might not make it another year. It's really too short for the space, and after seven Christmases, most of the pre-lit branches are dark and bent in odd directions. There are also some gaping holes that an ornament can't simply fill.

However, when we turn off the overhead lights, the Christmas tree lights cast this awesome glow on the wall behind, and I know that the magic of Christmas has arrived.